Oh, Grey's, What are you DOING?

On a normal Friday morning, my routine is normally pretty standard. I go to work. Since I'm an early-bird, I'm usually in early enough that I can write one of my daily blogs and, occasionally, throw one out to my Captain TV blog. I'm a TV junkie. I like to write about my shows whenever the urge hits.

Except tonight, since I'm in the EST viewing area, I've already watched Grey's Anatomy. And now I'm even more worried than I was last week.

This is supposed to be a general TV blog but it seems to be turning into a Grey's Anatomy worry-fest. Normally, I'd be writing about all the shows I love, shows I can't miss on a weekly basis. Normally I'd wait for the Grey Matter blog to show up, to make sense of the show I just watched. But tonight, I can't. I'm too agitated. Picture me pacing up and down, up and down. That's why I'm writing this, fresh after watching the latest episode.

The reasons I used to love Grey's are myriad. They are a collective of wishes and hopes for the show. But, in essence, here are the reasons I liked the show and believed in it:

• Because Meredith and Derek were really good together and as soon as they started acting like grown-ups, I knew it would work out.


• George will always be a bit of a wuss but he has a good heart and it always shows through in the end.


• Alex Karev is a tough guy with a heart of stone but he is just waiting for the perfect moment for the stone to dissolve and he'll reveal the fact that he is a softy at heart.


• Because I want Callie Torrez to realize she is worth so much more than George or Hahn and that she and Mark Sloan will flirt but never quite declare the fact that they are perfect together.


• Bailey is always be the smart, amazing, cool force that keeps Seattle Grace running and keeps the surgeries treacherous, tough but always possible.


• Because Izzie will always annoy me but she always have moments in which I actually like her.


• Because I believed Meredith and Christina's friendship would be the ship to weather all Grey's storms, whether ferry-boat disasters, near-bomb experiences, bad relationship choices and bad, stupid, contrived stupid-intern-created surgeries.

Now, most of those will happen and have happened. And Shonda and her gang could pull the show back to reality and make it happen. But, after tonight, the last three on my list....well, I'm a little skeptical.

Izzie Stephens is seeing ghosts. No, correction, a ghost. She's seeing Denny, played by the excellent Jeffrey Dean Morgan (who really needs to find a gig in which he's not dead, dying, or a ghost). At the moment, we don't know if she's sick, crazy or she's seeing what is really there.

Here's the thing. I don't care. Denny died. I liked him while he was alive. He made me smile and cry. Then he died. I moved on. Izzie did too. She moved on to George. She ruined his marriage. She gave the mass amounts of inheritance that Denny left her to Seattle Grace, a sign that she'd moved on. Then she continued her move forward towards Alex, another troubled soul. That wasn't so bad. I like Alex. I think he's interesting because we don't know that much about him and he has these moments in which he's a nice guy. They might be mere moments but they're enough to keep us fascinated. Izzie liked him too. She'd moved past Denny.

And, then, BAM! Hey, look, Denny's back! He's hot. He's in his white t-shirt. He's having sex with Izzie. He patiently smiles while she goes off to sleep with Alex. He's perfect.

But he's still dead. He died with dignity and poignancy. He's been revived in flashbacks and (near)death experiences. But he's dead. Until now. Now he's free to make Izzie moan like a porno and make her ignore the career that could lift her up from the depths of her grief.

Yet, that's not the worst part. The worst part of the show is suddenly my very favourite relationship is in jeopardy. Yes, Meredith and Christina are not getting along. And I'm furious.

Let it be known that I hate fan-fiction. Let it be known that slash fiction, erotica, and non-canon pairings make me cringe. I find it a poor substitute for reality. My Meredith and Christina never became a pairing in my mind, never was it more than what it was on the show: A friendship that was real, true and relatable.

And thus, tonight, I wanted to throw the remote at the TV. I HATE that suddenly, the 'you're my person' relationship has been ruined by the need for shock value, by the need to boost the ratings. Yes, I know Melissa George has a nice accent and that, by many, she's considered sexy. I know that the show isn't as exciting as it was because it's no longer a new show and has become a habit and a routine for Thursday Night TV watchers.

Who cares? I, for one, salute routine. I love the fact that I make sure I have my glass of red wine and my cosy couch in order to fully enjoy my Grey's Anatomy. I watched Alias. I tried to like Melissa George on that show, to try to distance myself from the fact that she'd married Vaughn after he'd thought Sydney was dead. I knew she'd turn out to be evil and she was, naturally. I liked being right.

And now she's on Grey's and, sadly, I don't care. I really wanted her to die onscreen tonight. I really wanted her to be the brave step that the writers were taking to pare down their desperate efforts to throw as many characters at us as they could, to try to make one of them stick.

None of them are sticking. Not even Kevin McKidd. I liked his character at first. I liked that he stapled his own leg closed. I like that he made out with Christina, just because. And then he came back and there was a Before and an After and I was a little worried. Then the writer's gave him a personality: He was the doctor that didn't like the soap-opera of Seattle Grace. He was the doctor that wanted to help the patients.

Yeah...that lasted for a week. Now he's sitting on Christina's stoop, waiting to kiss her again. I HATE that he's already succumbed to the fact that no (featured) Grey's doctor is irrisistable, that he must plant on his lips on Dr. Yang, A.S.A.P.

Don't get me wrong: I haven't given up on Grey's. I don't even want to. I love my Thursday nights; I love the catharsis I feel in watching the doctors screw up both professionally and personally. But one thing I could count on is that Christina and Meredith were the solid relationship on the show. That they were both screwed up just enought that they could talk to each other, rely on each other. But tonight, even that is in doubt and it scares me even more than the Return of Dead Denny does.

I don't understand why the writers can't just go with something when it's successful without wanting more. I don't understand why Seattle Grace can't have even but a few weeks in which they actually practice real medicine. I hate that the interns were stupid. I hate that Meredith and Christina are fighting. I hate that Izzie is talking to a dead man and we're supposed to just go with it.

Most of all, I hate that the one constant bright spot in my TV viewing week is tarnished by its own quest to shock, excite and gather viewers due to Blatant Writing Acts of Stupidity. I don't care why Denny is back. I just want him to go away. I want Sadie and the rest of the stupid interns to go away, to fade into the background in which they belong. Most of all, I want the show to give Sloan the storyline he richly deserves, to give Callie a chance at happiness and to show us that Christina, Meredith and Derek can all be friends because they're grown ups.

Ok, so I know it's TV and, thus, true grown-ups don't exist. But I can dream. And if dreaming means that Grey's loses its ghosts and gives LIVE characters a chance at having an on-screen personality that isn't tied to sex, sexual preference, or willingness to perform in the On-Call room, then I won't give up. Yet.

You can make Izzie nuts, you can make Denny real again, you can make him a mystical, Twilight-esque love (complete with allergic reaction from all sane adults who have read the insipid Stephanie Meyer series) But if you really destroy the Christina-Meredith "You're my Person" relationship then that's it.... I can't watch anymore. That's the relationship that resonates. That's the one that we get. Because when we're as mental and nuts as we can be, it's the friends who are there to pick up the pieces that matter. And Christina and Meredith are those friends, they're the ones who never fail one another, no matter how many stupid death-defying interns try to interfere. Don't make me worry about Bailey either. She's our rock. She's the force that guides us through the storm. She's an excellent General Surgeon. She almost gave up her marriage for that and now we're supposed to believe she's suddenly bored, even though the chief is letting her do domino procedures?

Also, let's not discuss the fecal transplant storyline. That goes back to the need for shock value except it doesn't really shock, it's just disgusting. I think it was supposed to be funny because there are people who always find poop funny. I, for one, don't. I do NOT want to think about that poor woman having to have poop go through her nose. Can we not find a better medical storyline than that? Seriously?

Don't desert us now, Shonda and the gang. Please. Don't be a Stephanie Meyer, falling in love with your fictional character (Denny) and unable to give him the dignity he deserves. Instead, let him go. Let Izzie move back to life. Death is hard but it's final. Disappointment and disillusion linger. Forever. Remember that.

Just give us back the Grey's that we love. Exorcise the ghosts. Clean up Seattle-Grace. It's ok. We don't mind. Seriously. Denny can Rest in Peace. We've already dealt with his death a couple of times. It's time you did too. Seriously.