But I Don't WANT to Watch "Private Practice"!

I apologize for not having any new posts for a while. I thought about blogging about Lost but there are far better, far more loyal bloggers who already cover that. I could have covered the super-bizarro dream I had last night in which I was on a Lost-esque island that turned out to have strange 'stations' which were more like something out of Stephen King's The Waste Lands than Lost. The same dream also featured Weevil, a character from Veronica Mars trying to attack Logan Echolls (also from Veronica Mars, lately of Moonlight) with Heroes' Ando/Elle powers of super electricical impulses and then being sucked onto the Lost-esque isle in order to help solve the mysteries. I mean, this is a TV blog and wow, my subconscious did seem to tell me that maybe I watch too much TV.

However, rather than expose you to the minutae of my addled brain, I thought I'd wait until this week's Grey's Anatomy since that seems to be the main theme of this blog lately.

On a side note, I read a spoiler/article that mentioned that Denny is NOT 'dead' as I had celebrated in the last blog but will appear until March. I'm ignoring that because tonight's episode had no Denny and no Denny is as good as Dead-Denny but not the haunting-Izzie-Dead-Denny but the good Dead-Denny who died at the end of Season 2. You know the Denny I mean, the charming one who made you sad when they played "Chasing Cars" and saw Izzie in her prom dress.

I digress. Onto tonight's episode. It wasn't bad, actually. Especially in light of some of the more recent episodes. I will say that until next week, I'm choosing NOT to acknowledge the big Private Practice/Grey's Anatomy crossover. It happened at the very, very end of this week's Grey's and one minute into Private Practice when the "Fourteen Hours Earlier" flashed across my screen, I realized that this week's PP was probably going to do something very similar and involve Grey's at the very last minute. Thus, I refuse to watch it. I already blogged about how I gave up watching that show. I don't care how much you try to tie Addison back into Grey's; if she comes with that super-sexed, super-annoying, super-smarmy lot from L.A., I'm not watching until I have to. For now, I'm going to try to skip the PP part of the crossover and try to stick solely to Grey's. It'll probably be a bit like trying to eat vegetable soup and picking out everything but the carrots but still, I'll try it.

Yet tonight episode of Grey's had some good moments. I'm so relieved that Christina and Meredith are friends again. I'm loving that Meredith is treating Lexie almost like a sister rather than an abhorred stranger. I'm enjoying that Christina is giving Dr. Hunt a chance, even if he is a little spazzo and very, very much Dr. McPTSD at the moment. I like that Derek is going to propose although I hate that the uber-dramatic PP/Grey's crossover "event" is getting in the way.

The things I'm not sure about is Callie and Arizona, the 'new' pediatrician. See, I though Callie wasn't sure she WAS gay. I thought Callie had decided she would never be gay in the way that Erica Hahn realized she was. I thought Erica Hahn left the show because ABC decided that the gay relationship was too much. Now, suddenly, Callie is gay. And she has a new love interest. I'm not sure where this is coming from. I'm not against gay relationships and actually, I quite like Arizona. I'm just confused, like I'm sure so many other viewers are as to why Erica got left behind, inexplicably and permanently in the allegorical parking lot of Seattle Grace and now, suddenly, it's ok for Callie to keep having flings with other women. I actually liked Hahn. I thought she was growing as a character but...whatever. I'll follow this storyline for now and hope that it grows and becomes something and isn't another excuse for Callie to be bitter and hurt by the cards that Shonda Rhimes deals her.

I'm also not sure about Bailey's newfound aptitude for pediatric surgery. I think that's a bad idea. Yes, she's good with kids but she gets WAY too emotionally involved and that's dangerous. She became much less Bailey and far more Izzie during the storyline with Jackson, the kid who was dying for the past three weeks. I don't like seeing Bailey falter and become unsure; I like my Bailey confident and secure. I think she should stick with General Surgery. It suits her.

And then there's Izzie. Now that Denny's 'gone', I thought she'd be better. Instead, she wastes hundreds, even thousands, of dollars having the interns run tests on her under the guise that she's teaching them because she knows she's sick but doesn't want to admit it. Once more, Izzie proves to be a financial drain on Seattle Grace and a drain on my patience.

Of course, she did get a lot more screen time than George who made a cameo this week. Yes, readers, George O'Malley appeared long enough to provoke our thought processes to respond: "Oh, hey, I forgot he worked here" and then he vanished. I like George. My advice to the Grey's powers-that-be, save George, lose Izzie. Not that they'll listen but I live in hope.

So, next week it looks like Addison's back, bringing her cronies from L.A. I know they're all friends with Derek so it'll probably make sense. I even think bringing Addie back to Seattle Grace makes sense. I just wish that would mean that her stint in Private Practice is over and she's realized that she belongs in the far more interesting world of Grey's Anatomy. However, I'll watch, hoping that Grey's will continue to make a come back into the world of good TV and finally leave behind the dangers of shark-jumping.

Because when Grey's is good, it is very, very good. It makes you count down until the next episode. It makes you compare people you know to characters on the show. It makes you smile when you remember quirky moments, sad when you recall the poignancy that stellar storylines can give you.

Yet when it's bad, it's scary. And when it's bad, it brings back Denny. And if he comes back, he'll probably tell Izzie: "I'm here for you". And we all know how Captain Monkeypants feels about that. It inspires anger and a tightly-gripped remote control. I've already worn off the writing below the buttons, don't make me break it too.

But this week had no Denny. And no Denny is good.

I live in hope.

Private Practice: No more TiVo for you!

I find there's a slow progression to breaking up with a TV show. If you're a TV junkie like me, TV shows are a little like a good relationship. When it's good, it's good and when it's bad, it's like a beatrayal. I've broken up with a few long-term-relationship shows before. I was with ER for almost 8 years before the African episodes with Benton and Carter made me realize I was too bored and unfulfilled to keep watching it. I broke up with Lost once because it irritated me and made me angry. I gave it another chance after hearing so many people tell me how amazing the finale of Season 2 was. Right now, I'm back on with Lost- I hope it's a lasting relationship this time.

At the moment, I'm going through a breakup with Private Practice. I gave it two seasons. Mostly, I watched it because I liked Addison Montgomery, who'd brought a spark into the walls of Seattle Grace on Grey's Anatomy. I also watched it because I love Taye Diggs. He's nice to look at, his voice is like velvet and I find him dynamically interesting. Usually. The final icing on the cake was Paul Adelstein who I had LOVED as Agent Kellerman on Prison Break. Agent Kellerman was awesome. He would have worked really well with Jack Bauer. If Jack Bauer was slightly evil. I'm hoping that he comes back to Prison Break. It would add to the ludicrously fun silliness of the show.

I've been trying to have faith in Shonda Rhimes.Greys had me a little worried last year but I trusted and believed and it got better again. Lately, Grey's is frightening me with it's potential-shark-jumping silliness (Read my previous blog for my take on that). But I believed in Shonda. She'd given me one show that I devoured weekly, loving the soapy-steam of Seattle Grace. I followed her to Private Practice. It was slower than Grey's, the doctors more grown-up, the slightly-cliche California hippy-chic setting cleaner and less messy than Grey's.

The thing was it wasn't really the Addison I'd loved on Grey's. She lost a lot of her steel and fire, she whined. She'd always been a grown-up on Grey's, her skill, expertise and no-nonsense attitude making her into a great doctor who cared but not too much. She started mooning over a man immediately as soon as she left Seattle Grace. She didn't fit. Kate Walsh didn't fit. The private practice itself, Oceanside Wellness, was annoying and filled with characters who were supposed to be quirky but turned out to be irritating. Most of the time I found myself wondering exactly how Violet the psychiatrist managed to get a license to practice because she's crazier and more unbalanced than most of her patients. Paul Adelstein's character was formerly addicted to internet chat rooms where he set up dates with women because he was supposed to be pathetically lovelorn. He's the pediatrician. I don't know if I'd want my kid to see him.

The first season was somewhat entertaining if a little uneven. I didn't really like any of the doctors much but I wanted to be as addicted as I was to Grey's.

So I started watching the second season and, well, frankly, I'm bored. I'm so bored with the routine of sex-scenes-in-the-beginning, bickering in the middle, sappy at the end. I hate the doctors, even Addison at times. I don't care about them. I've given it five episodes now and I'm done. The show is boring. Nothing happens. I don't care about any of those people. In fact, part of me sort of wants an earthquake episode in which Oceanside Wellness gets swept into the murky grey of the Pacific Ocean. They're terrible doctors. They come and go as they please. They have sex a lot. I have no problem with sex but I at least want to care about the characters so I'm happy for them. I like Addison's boyfriend, not as a character but because he's played by David Sutcliffe who was Christopher from Gilmore Girls.

At this point, I feel as though should be pointing out tips for improving it, finding ways to make it more enjoyable. But I can't. It's the type of TV viewing situation in which it's better to just put it out of it's misery. However, I would like to propose the following:

• Paul Adelstein goes back to Prison Break and has a spin off with William Fichner as "Mahone and Kellerman: Agents of Doom" (or something to that effect).


• Addison goes back to Seattle Grace, exorcises Denny and gets rid of all the new interns except Lexi. She sits Lexi down, lectures her on how pathetic and whiny she is and how she needs to grow a backbone. Lexi, in turn, gives Meredith a few pointers and the two sisters actually get along as well as co-existing. She also develops a specialty in Cardiothorasics so we can stop having heart surgeons who leave or have Aspergers.


• Taye Diggs and David Sutcliffe should get a new script that is funny and suits them both. They should invite Jeffrey Dean Morgan to join them. As a living character. Who does not die. And then comes back again. Several times.


• Chris Lowell should go back to Veronica Mars. Which would mean reviving the show. Which would be fantastic.

Everyone else can find their own projects. I like Audra McDonald so I'd be ok with her going elsewhere. Amy Brenneman has never been my favourite and Tim Daly is too smarmy for my tastes, no matter what role he's in.

But in the immediate future, it's time for me to break up with the show. I find that if you record a show and then make excuses for not watching it, it's time to face reality and give it up. That's how I feel about Private Practice. Maybe if Shonda lets it go with whatever dignity it can gather (though it's low on that in the first place), she can turn her attention back to Grey's and stop the gathering storm of mystical silliness that is gathering there. What I don't get is that this show gets to stay on the air and Pushing Daisies is in jeopardy. There's something not quite right about that.

But then, if TV executives listend to the fans, we'd have a lot more good TV and a lot less crap. And we can't have that now, can we?